A Koan
by
Jack Francis
(A contest on CBC Radio's Roundup commemorated Leonard Cohen's 65th birthday in 1999 with a contest asking listeners to wrote a koan, which is a short story in the Zen Buddhist tradition, Cohen being a Zen Buddhist. It had to start with these words: "Leonard Cohen asked the Buddha: 'What should I buy with my first pension cheque'?" The following is one of a number of koans written by Winnipeg Senior Citizens Writers' Workshop members.)
Leonard Cohen asked the Buddha: "What should I buy with my first pension cheque?"
The Buddha did not, as Cohen the bard half expected, treat the matter lightly considering the Buddha's disinterest in money. No, no, not at all. Rather the question received full consideration, and when the Buddha spoke, it was with carefully measured words.
"My Zen son, you must spend your first pension cheque to discover your place as a senior citizen. You must spend it on a seat sale and fly back to your square roots. Come, I will be your guide on this journey."
So they flew to Montreal, and when it got cold, to Florida, where the Buddha said: "Look about you. What do you see?"
"Old people, many old people," Leonard answered.
The Buddha nodded and asked, "What are they doing?"
"Dancing," was the response.
"Square dancing, Leonard, square dancing!" enthused the Buddha. "You see, thousands, nay tens of thousands, perhaps hundreds of thousands of seniors use their pensions to travel. At the first sign of frost they flock to Florida, trek to Texas, arrive in Arizona, and cavort in California. Some even wend their way westward to Kelowna and Victoria. And what do they do in those more temperate climes?"
"Square dance . . . ?" ventured Leonard. Then, with a flash of insight, he added, "Hey, man, that's my roots. I began as guitarist and folk singer with my own square dance group."
The Buddha smiled at this voyage of self-discovery. "And that, Leonard, is where your career as a senior citizen will find fulfilment.
After the Zen bard went home, the Buddha caught a few rays, chuckled to himself and mused, "Was there ever such a hip square?"